How to never quit.

never quit.

Thoughts on Purpose + Happiness

There are a few times this year where I’ve wanted to throw in the towel.

You know, call it quits.

Get a job at Starbucks (if they'd even hire me with NO barista experience), have someone else tell me what to do and learn how to make a really good latte.

But I never did.

I was pondering this phenomenon earlier this week, actually. How in the world do I make the decision to never quit, to not stay in bed all day, to keep going when things are really, really hard?

Why am I the way that I am, I wonder? What drives me forward most days?

Fear?
Duty?
Achievement?
Service?
Pride?
Gratitude?
Sheer stubbornness?
Perfection?
Happiness?

It’s a hard question to ask yourself, but an important one to answer if you really want to get going on the right track..not just get somewhere, anywhere.

I recently started listening to Dan Crenshaw’s book, Fortitude.

I loved this clip so much that I re-listened and typed it out word-for-word to share with you…because it’s just that good. I believe that we all need to hear what he has to say as we wrap up the end of what has been, for many of us, the most difficult year of our lives.

I hope this excerpt turns a light back on in your mind, reminding you why you're here, why you do what you do...and to never quit.

Kirsten

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“Purpose is meaning. And meaning is happiness. We don’t think about happiness enough, and when we do, we do not necessarily think about it properly. Happiness is neither joy nor entertainment. It is an ontological condition, fundamental in our existence as humans. It’s notable that when the founders drafted the Declaration of Independence they listed up front three things to which we are entitled-life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

That’s two things that we ought to have as such.

And one thing that we deserve merely to pursue.

The founders didn’t think the government should or could guarantee happiness, they only knew it should clear the path for us to chase it.

The chase, you see, is the point. The pursuit is the purpose…

…In 2018, Marcus Luttrell was kind enough to have me on his podcast. You may know Marcus as the author of Lone Survivor. That story is one of the battlefield epics of post-911 American history…taking on hundreds of Taliban fighters in the mountains of Afghanistan. Only Marcus lived to tell the tale. It’s no accident his podcast is entitled, "Never Quit."

Marcus asks every guest to tell their “never quit” story.

He asked me mine. When he asked, I requested that he stop recording. I needed to think. I wanted to get this right. This was the most important thing that I could share with his audience. Not the war stories, not the tales of camaraderie or suffering in the field.

This.

How to never quit.

After a few seconds, it came to me. Here’s what I said:

You have purpose in this life. God has you here for a reason. You may not know it, but he does. Your job is to find it. No one else can.

You need to understand that your purpose may be great in the eyes of the world, or it may be commonplace and seemingly small.

Your purpose might be your family, your children.
Your purpose might be tutoring a child and changing their life.
Your purpose might be the business you start.
Your purpose might be cleaning up your block.
Your purpose might be in the help you give others.
Your purpose might be in the example you set.

Only you and God know. Only you and God need to know.

Search until you find it.

And until then, act as if you have it.

…You were designed to use your reason and your natural gifts. And to cultivate those assets to a fulfillment of a higher end.

Your purpose allows for no Plan B...

Plan B should be less satisfying in every single way because it represents a lesser version of yourself, the anti-hero. It represents the version that decided to give up and convince yourself that you never really wanted your dream in the first place. It is a habit that must be broken in order to develop the fortitude necessary to face life's challenges.

...It is the decision to live with good moral intent and purpose, to live dutifully, it is the decision to take every small choice seriously because it is the small habits that drive you toward your purpose, your success.

Your purpose is yours. So is the choice of whether to fulfill it."

-Dan Crenshaw

Former United States Navy SEAL Officer
Author of Fortitude
United States Representative